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True Words by Jamie the Very Worst Missionary

« I was scrolling through iPhoto, looking for a certain pic from a long, long time ago, when I BURST INTO TEARS. And I don’t mean sweet, nostalgic tears for days gone by – we’re talkin’ sobby, snotty, gaspy, sore throat WEEPING because THIS IS MY LIFE, you guys, and it’s been so unimaginable, so amazing, so incredibly painful and insanely beautiful…and I’m just…I don’t know, I’m just…blown away.

I feel small and broken.
I feel incapable and insecure.
I feel stupid.
I feel lost.

The end.

But the highlight reel of my life – the one that hasn’t been filtered or scrapbooked or cropped for public consumption – tells another story.

It says I’ve grown up a little bit and I’ve healed a lot.
It says I can do hard things, go to hard places, write hard words. But it also says I can *and do* fail a bunch, and that’s alright, too.
It says I’m smart enough to keep three kids alive for 2 decades, and I don’t know if you have kids, but that’s pretty damn smart.
It says I have, indeed, been lost.
But then it shows how I’ve been found.
Over and over again, through deep friendships and brilliant sunsets and terrible road trips and spilled paint and funny family and squishy puppies and long flights and kind strangers…I’ve been found. I have been found where I wandered, and I have been lead back to the very heart of God. Over and over again. All over the world. In all the ways. Found.  »

And now I CANNOT STOP CRYING because WHO KNEW??? Who knew life could be this Rich and Full and Fun for the small, broken, worthless, stupid, lost people???

Hashtag Blessed.

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